The Annulment
by theressomethingaboutmary
Summary: Divorcing Edward Cullen would surely be the death of me."
1. Chapter 1

I was watching Seventeen Again and this idea popped into my head. Plus the concept is bound to have plentiful chase. And as we all know, I love the chase.

Tell me what you think.

Now back to that God awful story that you guys love for me to write.

SM OWNS EVERYTHING TWILIGHT.

*********************************************************

"What the hell are you doing?" he said, his eyes bugging out of his beautiful head.

I smiled curtly at him and threw another handful of his clothes over the balcony.

"What the hell does it look like I'm doing Edward. I'm throwing your shit out. You refuse to come get it so this is what happens."

"Are you crazy?" he said his hands gripping the ends of his disheveled hair.

I probably was. No thanks to him.

I snorted and moved around him to throw another load out of _his_ window, tripping over _his_ stupid rug that he had insisted we needed. None of it was _ours_ anymore. Not that it had really been to begin with.

Regardless, I was throwing him away. And that included his clothes.

"Bella, cut this shit out." He said, his brows frowning into the center of his head. I imagined the wrinkles in his forehead dancing around wildly.

"Why Edward?" I said as he stepped in my way, cutting off my path to the window. "Does it bother you? Am I irritating you?" I said acidly.

He stared back at me blankly.

I tried sidestepping around him but he was quickly in front of me. Close enough to smell the cologne I had bought him last Christmas and close enough to notice that he was letting his chin grow with stubble.

"Stop." He said.

"Move."

"You think this is going to make things better? Do you think I want to be with you when you do stupid shit like this?"

I laughed in his face, not a bit taken back by his words. It no longer bothered me what came out of his mouth. It's what went on in that head that killed me.

I stepped closer, invading his personal space as much as he was doing mine and smiled.

"I sure as hell hope not." I whispered into his ear.

He kept his eyes glued to my forehead as my hand came into contact with his chin.

"You need to shave." I gave it a small condescending pat and moved pass him, letting my elbow shove into his.

I grabbed a pair of his boxers that I had once been in love and hesitated.

"That's right. You wouldn't want to throw those away would you? To many memories." He said, a smirk set as stone across his features.

That asshole.

"Here." I said fisting them into his chest. "I'm sure the next one will love them as much as I did."

That set him in his place and for a minute I thought I saw a look of remorse in his eyes. And then his eyes dropped to my hand and he spoke.

"I see you're still wearing the four carats." He said in that stupid sarcastic voice that I loved so much.

"Get the hell out."

"Do you kiss your mom with that mouth." He said moving closer, his smile becoming wider and annoyingly more beautiful.

"Yes. I've learned from the best. How is ass kissing Esme coming along?"

I indulged in talking about his mom. She was after all, a bitch. And just like I knew it would, it set him ablaze.

The heat in the air was not even comparable to the amount of tension radiating between us. When we had gotten to this point…this relentless bickering I did not know. He used to be my everything, now he was a live representation of what _nothing _could do to you.

"Fine I'll leave. But speaking of asses, _yours_ is looking quite big."

And with that he left, and it was exactly like him to leave laughing at his stupid, arrogant, response. And it was just like me to smile at his retreating back.

Divorcing Edward Cullen would surely be the death of me.


	2. Chapter 2

**Update #2**

**- I wrote this a long time ago. I'm not sure why I havent posted it yet but anyways here it is. **

**SM OWNS EVERYTHING.**

* * *

Two years earlier…

"I don't know how you get it up so fast. I mean one minute your down and next minute…" I trailed on trying to catch my breath.

"You make it easy." He said his lips clawing at my skin. I brushed him off and sat up, searching for my shirt. But only once I spotted it across the bed on the windowsill, had I decided to just put his on instead. It smelled of cigarettes, linen and sex. It would do.

"I don't want to do anything today." I said turning back towards him. He had placed his angular reading glasses on his face and was just beginning to flip through a newspaper that had been lying on his dresser for weeks. I melted back under his blanket and wrapped my calve over his leg.

I loved him like this. Stress free, relaxed, and just Edward. No outside pressures. Just bare and naked for my eyes only.

"Of course you don't want to do anything _today._" He chuckled under his breath.

He flipped another page and I caught a glance at the article he was reading. And it made me a little sick inside knowing what today would mean.

"Don't you just want to cuddle with me all day?" I asked playing with the ends of his hair and looking over his shoulder onto the busy traffic of Monday mornings.

"I want to cuddle with you for the rest of my days. That's exactly why were doing this."

I let that roll around in my head for a minute before I spoke.

"Can't we just elope and get this over with?"

"Love the enthusiasm B," he said feigning offence.

"That's not what I mean. To me, were already married. I don't need a big wedding, I don't need thousands of flowers, or bridesmaids, or a cake…Just take me to city haul. It's a whole lot quicker _and_ we could still make it to Macy's blow out sale." I said referring to the special we were missing today because of what we "had" to do.

He put the newspaper down took off his glasses. We stared at each other for all of two seconds before he gripped the sides of my face.

"You might not want those things Bella, but you deserve them. And I want to give them to you."

I tried not to roll my eyes and instead gave him a weak smile. Because at the end of the day, we both knew that he wasn't doing this for me. He was doing this for her.

* * *

"You threw his clothes out of the window?" Rose asked, smiling.

In the beginning I had not wished for a messy divorce. I was not conniving or manipulative or any of that stuff. Hell, I didn't even want us to be at this point. But we were here, so I had to step up my game.

"Yes. And he still left without them. Again." I said.

I looked up from the pile of clothes Rose had placed for me on the bench. I hated shopping with her. In her eyes, money was negligible. Just an object of the world, that didn't necessarily have to determine your life style. Yet ironically, it shaped hers.

"I'm not trying this on." I said, holding up a Herve Leger party dress.

"You need that dress. Especially when you start dating again."

And that was exactly why I did not need this dress. I was too far deep in something else to even begin to think that there were other doors. Or windows. Or whatever the hell you wanted to call it. I was keeping mine closed for now.

"He still hasn't signed the papers. Even though he has had plenty of opportunities. What does that mean?" I yelled into the dressing room.

"It means he's playing the game Bella. He's dealing his cards just as well as you are. Except for he's winning."

When I didn't answer she stuck her head out and smiled.

"He's trying to piss you off."

"Well it's not working." I lied, toying with the ends of a fringed dress. "This is all a joke to him, and yeah it does bother me, but at the same time it makes me want our separation to be complete that much more."

"Yeah…" Rose said, and I imagined her staring at her body, not at all listening to my rambling.

We made it to the cashier fifteen minutes later.

"You need to take control Bella," she suddenly said as the cashier went to look for another pair of shoes in the shade Rose requested that did not exist.

"I threw the man's clothes outside of his own window." I said, tapping my shoe against the floor. "I thought I had taken control."

"All I know is that if it were me and Emmett, I would play on the one thing he cant live without." She said coyly.

"Wha-"

"Sex."

"Rose, I am going through a divorce. Clearly there is no more sex. That is not even a factor anymore."

"That's ridiculous. Edward is a man. It will always be a factor."

"So what do you suggest I do?" I said, humoring her for the fifteenth time that day.

"You'll figure it out."' She said, and with that we were off to lunch.

* * *

I was taking Rose's advice with stride.

I patted down the ruffles in my tight business skirt as I climbed the stairs to Edward's job.

Today was the day. He wasn't going to say no to me. I was wearing a tight business suit, with the slit ghosting right over my thigh. I had on five-inch heels, my breasts were perked, and my hair was in cascading curls. He would not say no to this.

I walked pass the secretary on his level without a second thought. She knew who I was. The whole building did. As I rounded his corner, my stomach suddenly twisted in a knot.

I took a deep breath as his body emerged behind the glass walls of his office. He was talking with someone when his eyes shot to mine. He smiled that stupid crooked smile that I hated as much as loved and stood up. The person he was talking to stood as well just as I walked into his office.

"I have to cut our meeting short Mr. Bennett." He said, his eyes trailing up my thigh. "My wife is here."

The man turned to me and smiled. "Hello Mrs. Cullen, it's nice to meet you. You have a great husband"

I looked at Edward who had folded his arms across his chest looking at me expectantly.

"Oh, he's not my husband." I said smiling down at the man. He frowned at me but I continued to smile at the new found tension in the room.

Edward snorted but didn't wipe off the smile on his face.

"I like your outfit." He said leaning back into his chair when the man left, his fingertips pressing together.

I ignored him and slammed the papers on his desk.

"Sign the damn papers."

"Do you want something to drink?" He said leaning over and paging Lucy, his secretary.

"Hey Lucy, can you bring me and my lovely wife some water." He said, emphasizing on the lovely part.

I crossed my legs and leaned forward, which caused my skirt to ride up. I cursed at myself because that was definitely not the message I wanted to send right now. And of course the bastard noticed.

"I'm not one of your clients Edward."

"Nope. You're my wife." He countered, smiling at Lucy who conveniently greeted me as Ms. Cullen while placing the drinks on the table.

"Edward. Sign. The. Papers."

He glanced up at me from his computer, which he had suddenly found interesting in the last five seconds, and frowned at me.

"What did you say?" he said.

I closed my eyes, muttering bright and colorful words under my breath. So sex did not work. He obviously didn't see me as the superior player in this situation as I had planned. I stood and leaned across the table so that my face was inches from his.

He smiled down at me, but nonetheless kept typing.

"Okay Edward. Don't sign the papers. But do believe me when I say that there is no chance in hell that you're getting Martin when this is through."

He snapped the laptop shut and leaned against the desk. "You didn't even want him. I had to beg you."

"You had to beg me to do a lot of things in our marriage Edward, and that is exactly why I am ending it." I snapped, throwing myself back into my chair and away from his sexy, distracting, lying face.

"You're not doing a very good job at ending anything. In fact," he said his eyes trailing down my chest, "I get the feeling that you're trying to start something that I'm not sure you can finish."

He smiled the crooked smile that I loved so much, proud of himself for changing the direction of the conversation.

"Pshh.." I grunted, rolling my eyes. " I have a date tonight."

That made him laugh and I stood to leave.

"And who is the lucky gentlemen taking my wife off of my hands tonight." He said placing his hands behind his head.

"Jacob Black."

And with that I left, smiling at the expression on his face and then quickly searching through my purse to see if Jacob could indeed take me out tonight.


End file.
